Wednesday, November 30, 2011

PYHO: Hanging on by a Thread

I'll eventually get to writing about why I've been on hiatus for about four weeks, but today something bigger is on my heart. I've been struggling with my youngest, Little E with his behavior. I partly blame myself for being a softie and letting him get his way. I admit it, I have coddled him way, WAY too long. And now it's biting me in the butt.

I also blame the behavior on preschool and the fact that he's four years old. I thought the three's were bad, but now that I look back at Miss K's year of four, she was a tough cookie too.

It didn't start over night. And it's not like his attitude change didn't happen on his birthday back in July. It has gradually gotten worse and my threshold for his badness has reached "the level".

Little E was always a sweet, kind little boy and reflected that behavior when he used to go to daycare.We never had any problems with him.Then before turning three I pulled him out and he stayed home with me. To prepare him for school next year, I placed him in VPK at a really nice montessori  based daycare/preschool. Since then he has complained about other boys treating him unfairly and excluding him.The teachers have not complained about him being bad to anyone at school, but who knows.

The problem: he's trying to befriend the wrong kids. The bullies, the "pretty boys", the rough kids. I can't choose his friends but when he starts reflecting their behavior at home, something has to give.

We've all heard the saying boys will be boys but that doesn't mean it's okay to come home and smack your sister because she won't give you what she has in her hands. And it doesn't mean when you don't get your way with mommy that you go to your room and kick the wall for ten minutes.

Dealing with the way he's been acting, doesn't make trying to get him to eat "big people" food any easier. I finally pout my foot down recently and will not cook him his own meal of either, chicken nuggets, hot dogs, fish sticks or mac and cheese anymore. He has to eat what we eat for dinner. We're on day five today and it's been awful to say the least.

I'm hoping this is just a phase and we grow out of it. Of course, he may grow out of it but I know we won't successfully make it unless I keep up with punishments and time outs.I'm open to suggestions from moms of boys who survived or are surviving the younger years.

Tuesday, November 29, 2011

You want me to sleep where?!

This was my home for four days just two weeks ago. I used to like camping. Or maybe I thought I liked camping and this was the trip that finished it off for me.

There's not really one specific reason I have decided that I don't like camping anymore. Well, maybe there is ONE. It's TOO MUCH WORK! I have this huge sense of gratitude for the women and children who used to live like that. Camping in the woods without modern conveniences requires lots of manual labor...all day long.

And if I had to live like that day in and day out, I tell you, let the bears eat me. I was mentally and physically exhausted by the time we got home and that was only FOUR days.

At least the kids enjoyed every moment of it. From playing in the woods, to making pretend teepees and sitting by the campfire every chance they could, they loved it. Two other couples and their children joined us on our camping trip this year which made watching the kids a lot easier. It also caused some extra stress and annoyances too.

I kept saying next time we won't do this or we need to say that, or we need to bring this. But now if you ask me, there won't be a next time.

My husband is so upset about it, he has threatened to sell all our camping stuff. Which I know I wouldn't let him do because the kids would be crushed. But I don't think I'll join them. Unless we decided to go for 2 days and picked a different campground.

One with hot showers..and running water...and daily know...kinda like a vacation should have!