PYHO: Always Obstacles

I was pleasantly surprised to receive a letter from the County School Board two weeks ago granting Little E's variance for the 2012-2013 school year. I wrote about my concerns back in May whether or not he would get to attend Miss K's school. I was stressing about the long wait I may have been facing and if he didn't get it.

I thought all my worries were over now that I had this piece of paper in my hand. I was wrong again.

I went by the school this Monday to drop off the letter for the school registrar and talked to my friend in the front office. She is like the school secretary/ school website web master. I asked her about the teacher list for the upcoming year so I could confirm which teachers I would request for Miss K and Little E. She told me she had just posted it online just a few minutes before I walked in.

Which meant if the new list was up, the teacher request form would be up also. Nope. My hopes were deflated. There's always an obstacle in my way, it seems.

She told me that the principal has decided to do away with teacher request forms due to new salary regulations on teachers being based on student performance. She is hoping to have the classes more balanced without having all the high scoring kids in the top two favorite teachers rooms.

The plus side, is that she is accepting letters of your child's needs and will take that into consideration when choosing the class for your child. She will not accept letters with a teacher request in them.

I am more worried about Miss K than Little E because it's only Kindergarten. The school handles this grade with "kid gloves" and I'm sure he will do just fine with minor adjustments from his new teacher. He aims to please.

I didn't know that I had a choice when his sister entered school and we got what teacher the school chose.  Which was an awesome teacher and one of the top picked Kindergarten teachers in the school.

Having dealt with several years of inability to focus, short attention span and limited short term memory with Miss K, she really needs a compassionate teacher. Some one who can understand that she has ADHD and won't treat is as a label. A teacher who can have open communication with me and be able to recognize when she is "slipping" and needs positive encouragement with a firm tone.

Miss K is a loveable child who has three previous teachers (not counting 1st grade-she was not a great teacher) who absolutely love and adore her. Especially last year's teacher who was the most help in accomplishing many goals we had set out for the school year.

I'm hoping that I can get this across to the principal that is is very important for Miss K academically, to be placed with a teacher like we hope for.

I'm praying this all works out for the good. I know that my prayers may be answered differently than I expect and I am prepared for that. I'm willing to deal with that but hoping for an "easy button" this time.

PYHO: Fear of the Unknown

My fear that Little E may not be able to attend the school his sister goes to have resurfaced again. Last year I wrote about this worry and later felt that it could have been premature. I felt relieved that he would more than likely get the variance and be able to attend at least two years in the same school as Miss K. That would have given me more time to prepare for homeschool or any other option.

So last week I signed Little E up for Kindergarten at our zoned school. I requested the variance form and informed the registrar why I was asking for it. While going over Little E's paperwork she stated that this coming school year, the state had not listed "Choice Schools" for the NCLB Act. She said it was talked about that students who were going to other schools besides their zoned school could be required to go back to the school they were zoned for. I was in shock!

This whole time I was worrying about getting my son into the same school as my daughter and I never thought about her losing her spot.

So today I called the zoned elementary school to inquire about Little E's variance form. The registrar told me that she had sent it on to the other school early this week and it might be at the School Board Dept. She gave me their phone number and the extension of the department I would need to speak to. What a very helpful and thoughtful thing for her to do. Especially for a parent who doesn't want their child going to her school.

I debated on whether or not I should call. I didn't know how my inquiring would affect my son's forms. I went ahead with the motherly instinct and called. I'm not sure if I'm glad I called or not. I spoke to the lady in the zoning department and she told me that his variance form had not come in yet. Not surprising. I'm not too worried because it's not like my answer will come quicker if it was.

I was told that I would have to wait until at least July 1st or later to know if we have been denied or accepted. I was concerned about Miss K's position at the school and was routed to another department. The lady that I spoke with was very helpful too. She reassured me that Miss K would not lose her place at the school she currently goes to, even though the NCLB Act has been rewritten by the Florida Department of Education.
 Without going into much detail, the Act that the Federal Dept of Education created did not accomplish the goals that it set out. 

The bad news, Little E could be denied and have to attend the zoned school while Miss K gets to stay at her school. Which is not an option I want to go with. I do not want either of my children to attend that school. The lady told me if that happened, I would need a Plan B. Whatever my Plan B is. She said I always have the option to appeal the school boards decision. Which if turns out to be the case, I will have to build a rock solid case. Not just gut feeling or mother's intuition. My other option would be virtual school at home. Which essentially is home school. Or private school, which in no way I could afford. Or charter school for both kids or just Little E.

I never thought that this could happen when I signed him up for school. I thought it was an open and shut case and then I would have to worry when Miss K left the elementary school to go into middle school. Nope. Life is never that easy. So I will now have to sit, worry and pray my hardest that God works this all out. Please God, just give me one more year. Just let Little E go to Miss K's school for one year. He really wants that opportunity. Please pray for us that it all works out.

I am posting this late for PYHO and glad that I did. Since this all came to light on Thursday.

WW: Hotel Hell

Spending an hour or maybe two a week should never be used to gauge whether or not you and some one can be compatible. Not necessarily compatible, but get along without thinking what in the hell was I thinking? 

Back in February, Miss K attended a Dance Competition that was held in Coral Springs, FL. It was pretty much mandatory to attend and to have a better experience it was encouraged to stay at the resort where the competition was being held. I checked the hotel price online and said hell no are they crazy?! I really wanted my daughter to attend and volunteered my paycheck to pay for the competition fees and classes but didn't know how I would pay for the hotel.

The hubs wasn't going to be able to go so it was going to be a girls weekend, just Miss K and I. I thought maybe if any of the other moms were going without husbands, one of them might want to share a room. I have befriended a few of the moms and thought I wouldn't mind sharing a room with one of them. I assumed figured that based on the price of the rooms, that they would be large and that if it was uncomfortable, we would have enough "space". Never assume.

The only mom that was willing to room together was mean girl's mom. Before going to competition I never knew that her little girl was like that. Or I would have never agreed to room with her or offered to share the bill on a room. I booked the room in my name and she was to pay me half once we got there. 

The Friday afternoon we left for Coral Springs, I got a later start than I wanted to. I left Miss K's medicine at home and it was of utmost importance that I made the trip back home to get it. So we were an hour behind schedule which put the other mom getting there before us. She texted me when she arrived and said they would just wait in the lobby. Fifteen minutes later she texts me "we checked in and we're in the room". I was like WTH? I had to control my anger at that very moment. If she had been any real friend of mine, I would have been fine with that. But to just go ahead and take it upon herself to do that, really set the tone for the weekend.

I was also very surprised that hotel staff would allow some one to check into some one elses room just because they knew the check in name. I never confronted the staff about it, but I should have. I was already mad about it and I'm sure she knew and I didn't need to make the weekend anymore uncomfortable than it had already become. 

After Miss K and I arrived I wasn't surprised to find that she had picked the bed closest to the window and the air conditioning. Something that drove me crazy all weekend. She "controlled" the air and I was sweating like a pig somewhat sticky when it was bedtime. I slept in a sheet to stay cool. I like to have a radio on or watch television to go to sleep, as does Miss K. We had to turn the tv off when it was lights out, because mean girl her daughter wouldn't fall asleep. It was one thing after another. 

I looked forward to the daytime when the girls had classes. I spent most of my time hanging out with a few other moms, reading my Kindle, hustling around to get lunch for the kids, preparing for competition or just being busy. It kept me from being closed in a hotel room with some one that really was different than I.

The day we left to come home should have been relaxing. The route that the mom used to drive into Coral Springs was different than mine and she wanted to know which way I used. I have GPS in my Odyssey and she does not. She asked if she could follow me home. Of course I told her no way yes.

Have you ever had some one follow you and not keep up the same speed as you? Seriously?!  The best part, I have a SunPass ( a transponder that lets you pass through tolls and electronically charges you) and she did not. So she had to pull through toll booths while I sailed through the auto lane. The first one I thought I would pull over and pause for her. After about getting killed by another driver when I did that,  I called her and told her she would just need to catch up to me after each toll.

When we reached the point where she would continue down the last toll and I would head towards another interstate (we live in different cities) I called her to say goodbye. She actually sort of complained that I never stopped for a potty break. SERIOUSLY?! I actually felt bad. for a moment. She very well could have called me and said her daughter needed to use the bathroom. We could have used a break too, but I didn't need rudeness if we stopped. 

So I will suggest, don't share a room with an almost stranger. It's better to swallow your lumps and fork out the money. For sanity. Well, I wouldn't have had a post to write though. I'll chalk it up as another learning experience.

This post was written for Mama Kat's Writer's Workshop. This week I chose prompt 5) What was the occasion? Write about the last time you stayed in a hotel.

PYHO: Dance Mom

Life as a dance mom has it's moments. The mundane trips back on forth to the studio. Sitting for hours in the viewing room watching your child through the glass. Dressing your child for class, getting the perfect bun. Competition weekends, the stress of accomplishing make up, hair, costume and lunch in less than an hour. Watching your child get criticized because she screwed up her step more than five times in a row. Then listening to the stories from the dance moms you have befriended.

There is so much more in between but I've given you a brief idea of what goes in in our dance life. Mine as the mom. Miss K as the dancer. You'd think I'd throw up my hands in defeat and walk out of the studio and not look back. But there's always a silver lining. 

She loves to dance and I sacrifice my time to make that happen for her.

Our first year at this studio I only knew two other moms and the underlying drama never affected me. I kept to myself and watched my daughter practice. Now that this is our third year and Miss K is on the competition/ performance team we know a lot of the moms. 

Miss K has made friends with her classmates and team mates, naturally. I've become friends and acquaintances  with several of the moms of her team mates. The one thing I've learned in life, from my own mistakes, you keep your mouth shut. You can be a better friend to some one if you don't gossip. 

Yesterday one of the moms told me that her daughter was criticized by of one the team mates about her technique on a tap step. I was surprised and looked in on the class and didn't have a clue about which girl would do that. She asked me if Miss K would do that. I know my daughter and she is a friend to everyone. She does not discriminate. I told her no way, K is a type A leader personality, but she is not mean.

Today in the competition class, during practice for this weekend's performance, the same mom was sitting next to me watching the girls run through the dance. The instructor had changed part of their dance and her daughter messed up something. The girl next to her, stops in the middle of tapping and walks over to the instructor. I was like what the heck?

The mom says to me "she's calling her out. I can't believe that. she's tattling on L". I looked at the mom and we shared the look.  I knew right then that the girl that just tattled on her daughter was the same one who made fun of her the day before. I was shocked. 

Shocked.

I was very shocked since we spent the weekend with that girl and her mom two weekends ago at the FDM Competition in Coral Springs. We shared a hotel room with them and I would have never guessed her to be so mean. 

That meanness can drive a wedge between girls who should be team mates.  

This realization makes me look at this girl in a different light. Sadly. I will not breathe a word of this to any of the other moms or my daughter, but it's one of those things that will be filed in my brain. You have to watch out for your back and your child. 

But I don't want to remove the sparkles from my little girls world. She LOVES to dance and enjoys it.   

Life as a dance mom for us is nothing like you see on tv. At least not our studio.

PYHO: Navigating Through

Navigating through the road map of being a parent to a child diagnosed with ADHD is pretty strenuous. It takes a lot of patience, time and scheduling. Just to name a few things.

For years I struggled with Miss K's inability to focus, stay on task and her horrible time management. Only recently was she diagnosed with ADHD. After the lengthy questionnaires and paperwork they requested before the actual evaluation, she was struggling yet again in school. There was no doubt anymore that I needed to get her help.

Once we finally got an appointment with the doctor, we had Miss K back on track again at school. She was doing better with daily reminders from her teacher. Thank God for understanding teachers. After the diagnosis I was still apprehensive on filling the prescription and actually handing her a pill to take once or, in our case, twice a day. I thought I could still prayerfully make a difference and not medicate her.

So I thought that maybe we could continue with what we were doing. But it was taking it's toll on me and I was neglecting Little E, because I had to spend extra time every day with Miss K. Then she starting slipping again and we were headed downhill. It wasn't surprising, since we'd been there before.

 We just recently started Miss K on the medicine. Slowly we noticed a change in her for the better. Now, after a month of taking her medicine, she is quite different.

It might seem like I could breathe a sigh of relief. Not so fast. It takes some of the pressure off worrying how she will do in school, for the moment.

It's my job to remember to give her the morning pill on time, everyday. It lasts about 4 hours, which then she should take another pill at school to cover her until the afternoon. Of course I was worried about her taking a pill at school. The whole thing with leaving class, everyday to go take her pill. The interruption, being gone and then the kids in her class wondering what she was doing. All those things. So I have been giving her the pill right after school. Which has created another problem. She is not tired when it's bedtime.

So last week, I decided that I would go ahead and get it set up with the school to have her taking her medicine there, right after lunch. I spoke to her teacher about it, so she should would be aware of Miss K leaving class.

I knew her prescription was coming due for a refill. Or shall I say, new prescription written. Thing is another one of the hurdles I will be dealing with, every month, every year, that she is on medicine. The classification of these types of drugs that are prescribed for ADHD, cannot have a refill, by law. So every month I have to call the pediatrician and request a new prescription be written and then wait 48 hours for it to be ready for my pickup. It cannot be called in to the pharmacy.

I picked up the script on Monday and immediately took it to the Target pharmacy, the same pharmacy I used last time to fill it. Of course, they are out of the afternoon (lower dosage) pill. They will have to special order it and it will be in by Friday.

Here's where my mom failure, is going to help us out. Several times I missed getting Miss K here afternoon pill to her on time, so we skipped it on those days and went without. I thought badly of myself at the time, but now it those pills are going to come in handy. But it shouldn't be that way.

I recently heard that the pharmaceutical companies are manufacturing less of these controlled substances, when the amount of children in the United States using them has been on the rise. According to the CDC, that approximately 9.5% or 5.4 million children 4-17 years of age have ever been diagnosed with ADHD, as of 2007.

So like I said, being a parent to a child with ADHD is strenuous, even with medicine to help your child. It's not a quick fix. Not like I ever expected it to be. It makes it easier for her to focus and do well with school and everyday activities and that is most important. Despite the hurdles I am beginning to realize are still there for me, I will continue to muddle through. God gave me my daughter. He knew what he was doing. There is a reason for everything and I wouldn't change it for the world.

PYHO: Admitting your child has a problem

As a parent you don't want to think that there is anything wrong with your child. They are this perfect human being that you created and you will stop at nothing to make their life normal. They achieve all the growing milestones on or before the average child. They talk at an early age and walk at an early age. Gross motor skills are right on target as well as fine motor skills. Then it's like something else happens.

I first noticed it when Miss K was going on two years old that she lacked the ability to focus on a given task. Even small tasks that only required a short amount of time and thinking, she would struggle.
At every pediatrician visit we would bring it up that she had issues. The answer was always, "it's her age. They have a short attention span at young ages."

So we struggled another year and would again repeat the concerns. Of course they would give us the same answer, that it was her age. They just didn't seem to understand that it's like she has all these thoughts going around in her head and she can't stop them.

Miss K is a very intelligent child, she just lacks the ability to focus for long periods and fidgets. She also likes to talk, too much sometimes which falls back into not being to focus and does not pay attention to her surroundings.  

 Her first year of school was a minor struggle. Since it was only Kindergarten and the school system treats them gently, she made it through.Unfortunately, the next year did not go as well. She received average grades but her behavior was causing concerns. We had several parent/ teacher conferences and a few conferences with the principal.

It was mentioned at one of the conferences about Miss K being gifted and possible testing. Her reading scores were high, she was on the next grade level and other areas pointed in that direction. I was dissatisfied with her first grade teacher and even more so when she failed to file the paperwork in time.

It was then that I was forced to wait until second grade to get the test done by the school. The teacher that Miss K got for second grade was really nice and loved my daughter. However, the class that she was in had two teachers with two classes. So the other teacher was not as compassionate and Miss K constantly got into trouble and her behavior was up and down.

By the time that I knew the gifted test was going to be performed, I realized it was not going to go well.With my daughter's inability to stay focused, it took her longer to complete tests, longer to produce answers and without paper she was going to score low. She couldn't just think the answer in her mind without writing it out. But I knew she wasn't going to ask for pen and paper for this test. It's mostly verbal answers.

By the end of the school year, I knew that I was going to have to pick her teacher for the next year. I was not going to leave it up to chance and hope she was placed with a compassionate teacher. If she was going to be in public school, I knew that she needed a better teacher to be able to make it.

This year has been completely different. Her teacher is amazing. We have had our ups and downs again, but this time I have been ready for it. And I finally stopped letting the pediatricians bulldoze me and I requested Miss K be tested for ADHD. They didn't fight me either.

The questionnaires were very extensive for myself and her teacher. I was also required to get test scores, report cards and any material that could show Miss K' performance. A few weeks after turning in the paper work we were called in for the first evaluation.

Miss K was diagnosed with ADHD with hyperactivity and low focus. The focus I knew, the hyper activity, I was some what shocked. But after thinking about it, realized that she has a hard time sitting still at times when she should be. The next step was deciding if we wanted to go with medicating her. I said yes and accepted their prescription and set up a follow up appointment.

But it wasn't until this past weekend that I finally started her on the medicine. I was still apprehensive. I thought, maybe we could still do this without it. Honestly, I was scared. The side effects worried me some. And explaining this all to her seemed very hard.

But in just five days time, I already see major improvements. It's amazing. We are seeing one of the side effects and we are supposed to call the pediatrician a week after starting the medicine. It's like the medicine has tuned out the random thoughts in her head and allowed her to focus on individual tasks.

I never thought it would take this long to finally get a grip on the issue. 

Dear Santa: She's getting wiser

A few months ago, Miss K started questioning the validity of Santa Claus. I wasn't prepared for her to start questioning whether or not he was real and I convinced her that he indeed was. I pulled it off, even though I would have liked to tell her the truth about it.
For  many reasons, I really dislike the idea of Santa. I don't like lying to my children for starters.  Too much emphasis is put on Santa and Christmas and he's not the one buying the gifts. And most importantly, what does he have to do with Jesus?
I honestly think by the age of  seven or eight, it makes sense to squash the idea. I'm tired of this "jolly old man" taking the credit for Christmas gifts and confusing my children about the real reason we celebrate this holiday.
Yes, this is partly my own fault, because I should have never let it get out of control when Miss K was able to understand Christmas. It was only about three years ago when I changed direction with this. I decided that I would buy the Santa gifts and have them come from my husband and I and Santa would get credit for one of the gifts from her Santa list and her stocking.

 Ok, I'm going to step off my soapbox now.

So last night Miss K did it again. She caught me completely off guard and said to me "mom, I know there is no Santa. There is no way he is real. Reindeer do not fly and there is no Rudolph.."

Me, completely shocked at how much she really disbelieved it started laughing. The kind of laughing that makes you unable to breathe laughing. I was making dinner, so I tried to hide my face in the fridge to collect myself.

After gaining some composure I said " how are you so sure? So if you believe there is no Santa, then I guess you won't be getting any Santa gifts and Little E will."

She stared at me for a moment and quickly rebutted " so it's true then. There is NO Santa. It's just you and daddy."

Some quick thinking on my part here.

"Ok then, I'll call him.You can talk to him".

She looks at me like WTH. I seriously caught her off guard. And then I quickly starting searching the internet for a phone number. Of course, I was not having any luck and she starting disbelieving me again.

Then my husband phone rings.

He tells Miss K, "it's for you!! Come here."

He turns the speaker on and you hear a jolly old voice that sounds like Santa talking about how he's so busy, he's got his "nice list" all ready to go for Christmas and that he heard that you've been good this year.

Miss K was flabbergasted. She got this look on her face that was priceless.

The phone call ended and she was just shocked that he called and told her she had been good. She said "mom, I have been good. I have."

 So I've decided to keep the "magic" going one more Christmas.....we'll break the news after the tree comes down. 

Pour Your Heart Out: Are you Listening?

I know I haven't talked much about Miss K and her academic performance in over a year. Actually since I wrote the post about her being tested for the Gifted Program at her school. The test was given last year while she was in second grade and unfortunately she did not pass.

I was disappointed and relieved at the same time. Disappointed because I truly believed she was smart enough to go into the program. Relieved, because at the time she was in a great class with an awesome teacher and I didn't want to pull her out of that class.

Then the realization hit me, that it was the best thing that she didn't make it. Miss K struggled with staying focused and on task. And she would have done poorly in a class that requires student independent working quite often.
We continually struggled with Miss K not paying attention, talking in class, getting out of of her seat and just "checking out" (mentally) during class. It was an uphill battle and tested my patience on many levels.After trying rewards for good behavior I thought I had gotten through to my daughter.

Thankfully with an understanding teacher, she did well and sometimes above average during the year.

So with all the hard work on both ends, for the teacher and I, Miss K passed second grade.

After experiencing a teacher who wants to work with me and my child, and sometimes going above and beyond, I chose Miss K's third grade teacher. It has been such a blessing. 

At the beginning of the school year, just like the past two years, Miss K was like a new child. Motivated, paying attention and listening to direction. Then it started all over again.

She has been coming home with "sign ins" in her daily report book, and has had to be constantly reminded to get back on task during class and at home with her homework. She not only struggles with school work but with everyday regular tasks at home.

The final blow came this week. Her teacher requested to talk to me about last week's math test. Miss K did not get a passing grade and the test makes up 40% of her final grade in math for the first nine weeks of school. I was crushed.

The thought has been in the back of my head for years about Miss K's inability to stay focused and perform everyday tasks. Then it bled into her performance at school and she has survived. But now it's affecting her ability to pass tests and will affect her ability to take the FCAT this coming Spring.I'm worried.

I decided I wasn't going to take no for answer with her pediatricians office about having her tested for a medically diagnosed problem. For years at her well visits, they brushed me off about her lack of focus, blaming on her age. Not anymore.

I was surprised that during my phone yesterday, the nurse said that they have a packet that needs to be filled out by me and her teacher. We are now taking the first step to trying to determine the issue. I am not afraid. I do not want my child to"slip through the cracks" in school because no one cares. We will conquer this and let no one step in my way.




So sorry to those of you who are regular readers of my blog. I am sure you have noticed that I have MIA for a week or so and I feel terribly for that. I have started so many posts and have not been able to finish them. I have had so much on my plate recently that even escaping to blog is not an option. Please bear with me and I will be back to normal soon. I love you guys.

PYHO: Purity Starts at Seven

I know that I am led to see or read things in my life. I believe in fate. Maybe even a little bit of pre destiny. This morning while getting my daughter's hair ready for school, it's school picture day, she talked about the last time she was at the dentist's office. Maybe it was because we were making a big fuss with how her hair looked. She said to me " the man dentist asked me if I had a boyfriend". I looked at her like what?

"I told him noooo", Miss K answered innocently "and then he said oh, by the next time you come to get your teeth cleaned, I'm sure you will". She was looking at me with question in her eyes as if I had an explanation as to why he would say that.

Heck I don't know why! Why would he ask my eight year old daughter a question like that? I know that she is a very pretty little girl, she'll knock you down with her gorgeous eyes. I may be partial because I'm her mother, but seriously, she is beautiful.

So maybe he figured that being such a pretty little girl, she would have a boyfriend. I really don't know.

This was the opening to the moment I plan on having with her later. At the time, I didn't know it. I get a monthly newsletter from Crosswalk Daily.com and it my email today, there was a parenting newsletter titled Sexual Purity Starts at Seven.


God was talking to me again. He opened my eyes this morning with Miss K's conversation and if I had not had that conversation, I probably would have never read this email. But it caught my eye because my awareness has been piqued.

I want to share this newsletter with you because sexual relations amongst preteens and teens is on the rise. I want to try my best to keep my daughter from making the same mistakes I made when I was a young teenager and the first step is awareness.

Sexual Purity Starts at Seven

Dannah Gresh

By the time she is sixteen, a Christian girl has a 50/50 chance of surviving life without the experiences of sexual sin, eating disorders and depression. Parents who “did everything right” can’t understand how it happened when their daughter falls on the wrong side of the stats. What they don’t know is that they may have done everything right, but started too late. The foundation for building an emotionally healthy teen girl -- who stands free from the norms of an at-risk culture -- is built between the ages of 8-12.
I have to hold myself back every time a white-haired grandma leans in to her pig-tailed granddaughter and teasingly asks her, “So, do you have a boyfriend?” This, usually said with a chuckle and a batting of the eyes, is generally meant to be just silly conversation, but I know too much to consider it to be cute. It is dangerous.  Being in a dating relationship for six months or longer is a significant risk factor for early teen sexual activity. Can you see why it might not be “cute” for our 8-12 year olds to be boy crazy or to have multiple boyfriends while they are still in the fourth grade? If she develops the pattern of “needing” a guy when she is eight or nine, she’s going to be in many six-month relationships in her early teen years. That’s not wise. Let’s help her stay off the boy crazy train.
I have two sixteen-year-old girls who have not only stayed off of it, but have managed to pull a few friends off. How do you navigate through boy craziness? There are three critical things you must do to prepare your princess to be successful in her quest for purity. First, you’ll need to have the big sex talk. Don’t think for a minute that it’s too early. Experts agree that sexual value formation begins when a child is between the ages of 8-10. A healthy, age-appropriate conversation during those years is critical. Second, you need to begin to establish your family philosophy on dating and begin to explain it to your child in stages. This will begin with the first stage of teaching her to related to boys as friends, not boyfriends in fourth grade! Finally, mom, it’s time to start dreaming of her future. If you take the time now to establish a dream of purity and a white wedding dress in her heart, she will know what to aim for and will be less likely to settle for anything less.
The book of Proverbs describes a virtuous woman. It says that she does her husband good “all the days of her life.” I think that includes when she’s seven!
*Article originally posted November 2009 on GirlsGoneWise.com.

I knew that I would need to start having the "talk" with her, but I never realized that it may be sooner than later. And I'm okay with that. 

Rockin the Baby or Babies

I'm linking up this week with my good friend Shell at Things I Can't Say for her Rockin the Baby link up. It was so hard to choose just one photo of my sweet kiddos when they were just little babes so I picked two of each. That was even pretty hard to do because I could just go crazy linking up photos of my kids.

Miss K at 5 months

Miss K at 9 months

Little E at 1 month

Little E at 6 months

Now that you've enjoyed looking at my little babes, head over to Shell's to check out the blogs who have joined in and maybe you can link up too!

Little Miss Citizenship

It's the last week of school for Miss K and she will no longer be a second grader. This year has had it's highs and lows, struggles with behavior ( my little girl loves to talk) but it has been well worth the ride with her amazing teacher. Last year's trials with her first grade teacher resulting in many visits to the principal paid off. My little girl was placed in a much better class with an awesome teacher who took the time to figure out what it took to keep Miss K on task.

With positive reinforcement for this last nine weeks, improving her behavior to almost perfect and being a model student Miss K was awarded the Citizenship Award today at the Second Grade Awards Assembly!!

I am so proud of my little girl! She finally figured out what it takes to be a great student and person at school. She didn't even expect this award which made it so more deserving.

Putting on the Ritz

It's that time of the year again for dancers to get organized, tighten down, perfect their dance moves and look their absolute best for the recital. It's been a crazy year as a "dance mom" driving Miss K back and forth three times a week, thirty minutes one way to dance classes. The pressure has increased these last few weeks will an ALL day picture call and dress rehearsals.

This weekend will be no exception, on Saturday afternoon we have to get Miss K dressed in one of her costumes, apply full recital makeup and do her hair for her Acrobatics class rehearsal. Next weekend we're having rehearsals for her other three classes and then the show is only two weeks after that.

I'm getting so excited! I bought my tickets for the evening show where Miss K performs two of her numbers. Unfortunately, I will be the only one who sees her at the matinee show where she performs her ballet and jazz numbers. I will taking photos and videoing her though!

Wish us luck for a great performance and that I survive these next few weeks of driving to and fro.

Wordful Wednesday

This past Saturday Miss K's dance studio had their
Studio Photo Shoots for their upcoming Dance Recital

I brought along
my camera to take some photos of my own of her beautiful
face in her oh so cute costumes
Glad I did, the photographer wouldn't let us take photos once in the
"studio" with the backdrop

Tap Outfit

Acro Outfit

Ballet Outfit

Pour Your Heart Out: My child?

I went in for an impromptu conference with Miss K's school principal today. It went better than I had hoped it would and I'm looking forward to seeing if she can get me some answers. It goes with the territory, no one else is going to fight for your child but you.

Yesterday I walked up to the school parent pick up and Miss K walks up to me with a sullen look on her face. I know that look.
"What happened" , I ask her. "It's.... bad, mom", she says to me.
"How bad?" I question, hoping she didn't do something outright horrible.
" I got a ....red, mom."
"Why? What did you do? Who were you talking to today?" , I press for information.
"Nobody mom. I was reading a book during reading time and Camren came over." Uh, I knew it, Camren. The child that will not go away.
"And did you tell him to leave you alone?" I questioned.
"I ignored him mom, I kept trying to read my book." she tells me, still looking very upset.
"So why did you get a red for behavior, K??" , I ask again. "Because Eric, the classroom monitor said I was talking and he moved my color down."

What!!!?? WHAT???
This is where I get mad. Why is another child in the classroom deciding her behavior? Where was the teacher?

I found Miss K's teacher at the parent pickup loop directing traffic and approached her. I asked her why did K get a red behavior report. Get this.

She doesn't know why. REALLY?? I explained and repeated what Miss K told me happened and she had no answers for me. She told me that she was out of the classroom and her co teacher was in there. I couldn't believe that a teacher wouldn't know why a child had a bad behavior report and would still send that report home for their parent to sign. I expressed my concern about this lack of information and wasn't satisfied with the answers she was giving me.

So after leaving the school I called my best friend who used to teach in the public school system. She told me that another student can be a classroom monitor but he/she MAY NOT decide their behavior color by their own choosing. I pretty much knew that and wanted to make sure I was right.

I hung up the phone and called the school. The principal was in a meeting so I spoke with her secretary. By now, I would say the secretary knows me by my voice. I have been quite an outspoken advocate for my daughter since she started going to school there three years ago. Patti asked me the reason for my call and I expressed my urgency in resolving this issue. She took my cell phone number in anticipation that the principal would call me last night.

Unfortunately she never called me. I don't "let sleeping dogs lie" and went to the school office first thing this morning. It definitely pays to be on the School Advisory Council and a school volunteer because I walked right in and was told I could find Patti ( the secretary) in her office. After telling her that I never got a phone call last night she immediately tried to schedule me an appointment for this morning, but the principal was going to be in evaluations all day. So Patti went to find the principal for me right then.

I got to have my parent/principal conference right then. I told her everything that had transpired between myself and the teacher, what Miss K told me and my concerns about another student being in charge instead of the teacher. She was concerned and about this issue. I know that my child is not perfect, but I know when she is telling the truth and not trying to get out of being in trouble.
I also got my opportunity to talk about next year and classroom placement without Camren in her class. He and Miss K must be separated. It is vital to her excelling in the classroom. He is quite the distraction. I am looking forward to what happens for the rest of the year. Only nine weeks left of school.

UPDATE: While picking up Miss K from school today her teacher approached me and told me that per my note request in Miss K's folder that it has been taken care of. Miss K got a blue today. (Blue is the top of the behavior chart. Which is where she has been 90% of the last semester.) The squeaky wheel gets the oil.

Sea World trip 02/19

We took the kids to Sea World on Saturday
It's so nice to have annual passes so we don't have to rush in
and rush around the park to see EVERYTHING
in one day. We took our time seeing the shows that we wanted
playing a few games while daddy rode the Manta. (Miss K was still not tall enough)
Little E LOVED the shark encounter and checking out the manta rays.
This was the first time we took the kids to feed the sting and manta rays
they LOVED it!

Miss K looks so funny. She was telling me about the games and
trying to win the stuffed animals


Riding down the conveyer through thee Shark Encounter tube

Sea World has changed how you feed the dolphins and it's
a much better experience. We had a great time!

My two sweeties waiting for mommy
Daddy took a great pic!

Halloween Costumes

Photo Credit

So I've decided what the kids are going to be for Halloween.
Miss K is going to be a fairy, complete with wings, tutu, leotard
and all the glitter you can handle.
I'm being pretty crafty this year again and I'm putting
the kids costumes together myself.
I bought the tulle to make the tutu myself.
I went online and found instructions on how t make one.
Wish me luck!

Little E will be this!

Jack Sparrow the pirate!
He doesn't know that is who he is
going to be, but he knows he'll be a pirate.
We're changing it just a bit since I only have the headband with
dreads from the costume.
So it's going to be combination of Jack Sparrow
and Captain Hook.
Complete with eye patch, earring, hook and sword.
My little guy is going to be soo cute!

PYHO: 2nd Grade Blues

Up until this school year I have always thought my seven year old, Miss K was a intelligent child. At six months she starting talking, at nine months she crawled, at ten months she walked and at two years old she sang the Pledge of Allegiance.
Learning the basics for entering school came to her so easily and upon entering Kindergarten I was not nervous about her ability to learn. We had our struggles with her social behavior because she likes to talk. Other than that he classwork was average for a five year old.
First grade was another struggle with her inability to stop talking to friends but her classwork was a breeze. Her handwriting skills were above the rest of the kids in her class and she was in the highest reading level.
But this year has been a struggle. It's not just the homework that she is having difficulty with she is also having a hard time taking tests. Miss K can read a 40 page book quite well but if you ask her the point of the story. Blank stare. We have tried breaking down the story into sections and she still has a hard time with that. Reviewing the story several times still doesn't help much and when she has to answer a question about the book she looks to my husband or myself to give her the answer. She won't try.
I try not to get frustrated with her but when reading books turns her to tears it breaks my heart. I don't know how to help her. We have requested easier books to see if we can step back a little and find what works for her. We skipped doing the reading homework this evening since we spent four, yes four hours working on it last night.
We tackled math which is another subject she is currently struggling in. I'm not sure what these teachers are teaching her or if she is even listening. I have questioned the possibility of ADD to her pediatrician and he turns a blind eye. He feels it's her age that is causing her to be unable to pay attention and focus in class.
We are having a parent/teacher conference this Friday. I'm hoping together we can find the problem with Miss K and find what works for her. Maybe her way of learning is different and we have to find it. I'm hoping to find answers.

Stage Moms

Remember about a week a ago when I mentioned the other catty mom's at dance class. I was unable to watch my daughter in her tap or ballet class because they blocked the viewing windows. So last Thursday I got there early and parked myself a chair and Little E a chair right in front of the windows. Of course I was given a few steel grey eyes and backward glances and sometimes they moved in and quietly said nothing. Well, the nothing was their heavy sighs because Little E would stand up in his chair and block their view. Yeah, whatever.

I was warned that I will have to deal with the catty moms, the "stage moms". My close friend from high school has her daughter's attend the same studio. She is actually the person who referred me to this studio and gave me a head's up on how "other" mom's are. She gave me advice and said that I should throw her name around a little. Since her oldest daughter is in the studio's senior competition dance group, the other mom's will kiss my butt. I'm waiting, it hasn't come to butt kissing yet.

Last year Miss K was only in one class on Friday evening's and we never had to be in contact with "those" mom's. I got a small taste of what I would be dealing with over the summer when I enrolled K in a summer class of tap/jazz/ballet. The mother's of the girls in her class were pretty nice but the class after ours, whoa!! They would arrive 10 minutes early and even though their daughters were standing right beside them, for some reason they would try to push up to the window and see what our class was doing. The nerve!

So last night at her ballet class I was lucky to score a chair near the window. Since Little E had taken a nap earlier in the day he was full of energy and I tried to keep him occupied with several toys. I tried my best to peek in on her class from time to time but as usual, the catty moms were blocking the window. I have had enough of it though. Seriously. I think I hit my last nerve when one of the mom's thought she could scold my son and tell him no. I shot her the look, YES THE LOOK. I was pretty hot by this and flashes of getting up and giving her a piece of mine were running in my head. But I thought better of it and gave her the evil eye. It worked. She knew I was pissed.
I am getting there early again tonight. Yes, I will camping out on a chair up front and center. I can't wait to see what happens. I think I may buy myself another frappucino and let Little E has a sip. Ya know. It might keep the vultures at bay.

Writer's Workshop- What my little girl might say

This week I chose prompt #1 for Mama Kat's Writer's Workshop. Dear Mommy/Daddy write a letter from one of your children to you. I loved this idea.

Miss K- October 2009

Dear Mommy,

I never realized how much work you put into the week to take care of me. I haven't put much thought into even one day of the stuff you do for me. It's nice to have a mommy wake me up and let me crawl back into the recliner when I am not ready to face the world. I love that you make my breakfast for me and put it on the table. I enjoy sitting next to my brother even if we do get into trouble if we talk or play too much. I really wish you would let me have chocolate milk and get rid of the red container of milk. It tastes yuck! Have you tried it yet? I really wish you would get the purple container again. I promise I will drink at least two glasses a day. Pretty please.
Thank you for picking out my outfit everyday. I wish you would just let me wear my flip flops to school. I don't mind wearing them all the time.
I know I should make my bed faster and get dressed instead of playing with my toys but it's more fun. I am a big girl now and I can get it all done before we leave. I know I should read the clock but what fun is that?
I love it when you pick me up from school. Thank you for getting there on time yesterday because I was worried the first day. You took a LONG time. It was getting hot out there on the sidewalk. I know the other kids were waiting too but it seemed like forever.
I wish you would let me have a snack of chocolate chip cookies instead of the banana or apple in the afternoon. It will fill me up more. I promise that I won't get "hyper" as you say. I'll share the cookies with Little E. I promise. Really!
Thank you for picking up my toys while I went to school. I know I forgot to turn off my radio again but Teeko likes to listen to the music. It'll be okay mom. Can we get a slushee everyday? I love the slushees. They are refreshing.
Thank you mom for reminding me to brush my teeth and hair every night. I am forgetful and I am so busy playing on the bunk bed that I forget. I love you mommy. You are the best and I love you.
Can we get a slushee now?
Love,
Miss K

First Day Back

Ready to go on the first day of second grade
Back pack-check
Lunch Box-check
New Outfit-check
New shoes-check
Prepared to wake up early- not checked

Looking for friends while we wait
for the teacher

Picking up Miss K after school
she tells me "mom, get in the parent pick up
line earlier next time. I thought you weren't coming"
if it was only that easy. It was pure chaos!
The city police were directing traffic and making it worse!!
I was directed away from the school entrance the first time
and told I would have to loop around and come back again!!
Let's just say tomorrow I will try to get there earlier.