Thursday, April 28, 2011

Red Writing Hood: Not a Fighter

I didn't want to go back there, I was safe behind these walls. Being home I was protected by brick and mortar. The phone rang and I didn't answer it, the answering machine picked up. I tuned out the venomous words that were spoken for me. It didn't matter what they said about me on a machine, it could be easily erased from an answering machine tape with the click of a button. It was going to be a long Christmas Break, it was just the break I needed but never expected.

Just two weeks earlier the eight of us were a group of girls, eighth graders enjoying our friendships. It started out with three of us being close friends together. Julie. Tera. Me.
Inseparable. Best friends.
We each had another close friend and they joined our threesome. We shared lockers together, makeup with each other, traded clothing and spent weekends at each others houses. Lunch at school we had "our table". We sat together. Everyday.

When you have three, some one is going to get left out. Disagreements happen. Girls are viscous. It happens overnight when you're not there to defend yourself. The next morning you go to school and they've decided that you're not their friend anymore.

You hear from some one else in the group that Julie is pissed off with you. You know that the rest of your day is going to suck. It's lunch time and you go to the place you've always sat at with two of the girls from your group. You go to sit down with lunch tray in hand and Tera tells you, "you're not sitting here today". What?!

Julie shows up, she carries herself like she is queen of the lunch room. She looks right through you and gives you a cold, hard stare. The look that tells you you are not worth my time. The classes you share with each of them are more painful. You can't sit at the desk you always have because they have invited some one else there. You find yourself slinking to the back of the room while everyone stares at you. You see them whispering about you.

The locker you once shared with Julie is now being shared between Tera and Julie. You have no choice but to approach her about your books and backpack in her locker. She hears you and after much thought she throws them out on the floor of the hallway. How much worse can this get?

The week before holiday break gives you false hope that you will survive and everyone will make up. Tera and Julie have stopped talking about you and giving you a hard time. You're looking forward to the eighth grade party on Friday during the last two periods of class. But they circle you and your friends Nichole and Brandy.
"You bitch. Why don't you just get lost. I want to kick your ass", Julie spits at you. You're terrified. You're not a fighter.
She is not satisfied anymore with just ignoring you.
"Just leave me alone.", you say. The bell rings for the end of the day and you can't get to the bus fast enough. Julie follows you to the bus, calling you names and pushing you from behind. Stupid. Whore. Slut. You know as soon as you board, you'll be safe. You may not be a fighter but you will not show her your weak. You never cry. Not in front of her.

This week, we want fightin' words.

Write a piece about a fight. What happened? Why? Who "won"? What were the repercussions?

Show us. Use emotion. Description. If it's a fist fight, what did it feel like to hit someone - or be hit? What does it feel like to be screamed at - or get the silent treatment?


Queen Bee said...

Great writing! I felt the terror of being picked on and left out. Girls are viscous.

Varunner7 said...

Oh gosh, the you're not sitting here totally hits home. I was in a crowd of barn girls (we all hung out at the barn all day in the summers, with our horses) and there was a lot of that going on. So painful.

Melissa said...

4th grade. that happened in 4th grade for me. their names were martha and jenny. sometimes a girl named joanne would join in. this...hit home. wow!

JennaFarelyn said...

been there. i felt the emotion and the betrayal and the desire to not appear weak... everything. great storytelling!

Random Girl said...

Been there, done that! On both sides of the equation I am ashamed now to say. Girls are vicious. Grown up girls are not always much better, the fights just take a different tone. Competition causes girls to be mean. Great writing. I was right there in the moment.

Jennifer@VodkaCalling said...

Going to be honest here, in my opinion, so far out of all the different post I read today, (Maybe 8) yours is my favorite, very real, I could see it, nicely done.....and girls are vicious!! I have two young daughters, I hope to god they never have to go through anything like that.

crazykindofmom said...

Thanks! I hope that Miss K does not go through it as bad as I did.

crazykindofmom said...

Sorry to hear that you know what that feels like.

crazykindofmom said...

Girls can be so mean.

crazykindofmom said...

Thank you for the compliment.

crazykindofmom said...

So true about how women are when arguing. Thank you for the compliment.

crazykindofmom said...

I hope that your girls don't have to experience it either. Thank you for the wonderful compliment. You are too nice. :)

The Reason You Come said...

I love how this was told! But that must have been such a terrible feeling. Girls can sometimes be so mean to each other.