Friday Fragments: Episode #182

I really wanted to write a full, real post this week. One that didn't require a prompt or meme link up. I failed. I just had no energy left this week. Playing catch up after being gone last weekend is exhausting.

My husband celebrated his 35th Birthday on Thursday. The kids and I bought him a cake and the kids insisted I buy candles for it. We got those "magic" ones. I thought I only bought one package with 8 and when it came time to put them on, I realized both packages had them. We had 20 relight candles on the cake. Do you have any idea how hard it is to light 35 candles??

I am hoping to plan a Super Bowl party this year! My husband's team is playing. Go Patriots!! The last time they were there, Little E was just an infant and it wasn't possible. I'm on the hunt for recipes and ideas.

I discovered while on the social security website today, that when applying for a US Passport, if your birth certificate was applied for a year after your birth, you need extra required documentation.* my husband is going on a Mission Trip to Haiti this year and needs a passport*

I realized recently that Little E is OCD like me. I'm not sure if it's because I have spent more time with him being a part time SAHM with him and not Miss K. Or it's genetic.It's a little annoying, because things have to be a certain way with him, but he's not always capable of making those things that way. Leaving me to take care of what he wants.

Have you ever tried Greenwise (non hormone, free range) meat? Like beef? I bought a steak that was like that for dinner for my husband and wow! There is a significant difference in texture and taste. I recently started buying cage free, hormone free brown eggs and they are by far much better. The prepared egg has much more flavor, better color when scrambled and the shell peels much easier than the traditional store brand large white eggs. They even beat out Eggland's best brand.

What is it with tv shows this week? After no new episodes during the holidays and the we finally got like three weeks of new ones to get re runs this week! I want to file a complaint! lol.

WW: It's My Life!

 1. I used to dress up my cat Patches when I was a kid. There were many times when some one would open the door to my room and my cat would come hauling butt out with this wild look on her face. If she could have talked she would have said please some one help me!!! I'm being tortured. It's what happens when all you have is a little brother and you've been forbidden to dress him up in girly clothes, so you choose the next best thing.

2. There were times that my little brother did not escape my attempts at getting some one to join in my dress up time. He actually was a willing participant and let me paint his fingernails and toenails a few times. It was Barbie pink peel off nail polish. That was the last time it happened, because my father threatened my little brother that if he let me do it again he would make him wear a dress.

3. I will never forget the time my older brother ran the riding lawn mower up the side of the satellite dish( you remember those things- they were before the compact ones that you see on the roof) in our yard and blamed my little brother and I. He said we changed satellite direction and it moved causing him to get caught in the arm and run it down with the mower. My little brother and I were punished, spanked and sent to our rooms in tears knowing full well that we did not do that. The next day my brother confessed that he was riding the mower at full speed and lost control and blamed us. It still didn't take away that horrible memory.

4. It was the year that my parents finally got a "real" compact video camera, replacing the one that required you to carry a portable VCR in a bag, for Christmas. We had finished opening all our gifts and my brothers had both received RC cars that year. Mind you, I was 13 or 14 and was in full attitude for those years. My parents told me to take the camera and go video tape my brothers driving their cars. I was none too thrilled about this and proceeded to complain the entire walk through the house, down our driveway and down to our cul de sac, all while it was being recorded unbeknown to me. My parents still have that on tape. I'll never live it down.

5. My dachshund Schnitzl was the kind of dog who let you know if he didn't like some one. He usually barked at the person, growled at the person or in a few cases, peed on the person to let you know. My younger brother was dating this girl at the time and I never knew my dog had decided she was no good. Until one evening at my parents house. This girl was sitting on the couch in the family room and my dog jumped in her lap.She was loving on him when he decided he would let us all know that she wasn't acceptable. It was pretty funny. Until he did the same thing to my husband several years later. (yea, and we're still married)

6. My boyfriend (who is my husband now) thought he would be really cute and show me how fast his motorcycle could go up my parents driveway (they live on a large hill with a long driveway). It was cold that night and he had his riding gloves on. I was standing in the lawn watching him race it up the hill, smiling at him and then my face went to horror as he never stopped until he hit my car!! He smashed his bike right into the rear of my car with his bike. Apparently, his heavy gloves caught in the throttle and he couldn't stop it in time.It was pretty horrifying to watch.  I'll never let him live that down.

 7. My sister in law (my older brother's wife) used to hang out all the time when my brother was enlisted in the Navy. He was gone for boot camp and we went to the movies one night together. We bought the largest popcorn and ate the whole thing before the movie started.  When we left after the movie I joked to her and said next time we just need to buy a vat of popcorn.!! We actually just joked about it when we saw each other this last weekend.

8. Egg nog with nog. I'm not sure what your families call it, but when you add Wild Turkey or Bacardi Rum to your egg nog, it's nog with nog in my family. We used to drive around at Christmas to look at the lights and bring our "egg nog". It was so cold this one year and since we were piled into the bed of my dad's pickup truck we decided to wrap up in a large blanket, while he was driving down the road. We lost track of the egg nog jug until we heard this loud pop!!! We uncovered our heads just in time to see the egg nog all over the road. Needless to say, that was the last year of egg nog and pick up trucks.

 9.What is it about holidays?!? Family gatherings seem to bring more stories. There was the Christmas, back in the 80's that we spent sitting on our lawn while the turkey sat in the fridge because we were without power- ALL DAY. Apparently a little squirrel decided he wanted some warmth and somehow managed to get himself zapped, thus popping the transformer connected to our house. We found the only place, two towns over, that was open on Christmas Day for our Christmas dinner.

10. August 13th 1999. My birthday was on a Friday that year and my mother bought me a Ouija Board. I was born on Friday the 13th and was always fascinated with the spiritual side of being a Friday the 13th baby. We used the board that night. My boyfriend, my older brother, his wife, my younger brother and his then girlfriend. It creeped out most of the group, but we did use it. I won't go into detail, but I honestly believe it works.

I'm linking up with Mama Kat today and chose prompt #3.

 You know the stories that are retold a million times at family gatherings? I call them Life Stories that you just never live down. List your Top 10 Life Stories.

My title made me think of this song. Enjoy!!

Friday Fragments #181 and Five Question Friday:

 After last weeks fragment post about my laundry, I used the tip from Ann in the Up about throwing in two loads of laundry a day every morning. Now I didn't get the loads in every morning, but I did three on Monday, one on Tuesday, two on Wednesday (thanks to a doggie having a potty accident) and one on Thursday. The laundry mountain never appeared. It was much easier doing one at a time.

 I don't know if I ever mentioned getting a dog back in October that started out as a foster. We fell in love the first day and adopted her. I felt bad for closing the door on fostering dogs for the rescue group so I told them I would open my door to another dog. Well we got another foster last Saturday and boy, having three dogs is a lot of work. Especially this one that came to us. The poor thing has been in several foster homes and needs to relearn basic doggy manners. In a weeks time he has done quite well. I'm impressed. The person that ends up adopting him will get a well mannered, sweet tempered dog.

 The one day that I didn't walk Miss K to class (I have walked her every day this year), I miss out on finding out that there is an awards ceremony for 3rd grade. Sitting at work, I get a text. K received the citizenship award. I couldn't believe it! I missed seeing her get this award!! I was SO bummed. My husband and I were so proud of her that we took her out for dinner, her choice.
This was the first time she received this award since starting Kindergarten.

I have another busy weekend ahead of me. My grandmother was in the hospital for four weeks and last weekend went to a rehab center. She should be there two weeks and then re evaluation to see if she is capable to go home. ( she has been bed ridden for two years) I am going into visit her on Saturday and Sunday. I haven't seen her in three weeks. Again, another reason the laundry work has been a blessing in disguise.  

I really dislike Florida weather. It's really stinks when it can't decide whether it wants to be cold or warm. We went from low 40's at night, last weekend to high 70's Tuesday through Thursday. Then a front pushed through, brought sprinkly rain and now today dropped back to the 50's in the afternoon. It has created a head cold for me. Hot throat, runny nose, sinus pressure..... ugh.


I usually don't combine memes, but this Friday I'm going for it. It's easier this way since I have a full plate this weekend. Heaven help me.






1. Where do you hide the reeeally good snacks?  Well if I told you, then you might come over and eat them. Then when I go looking for them, they'll be gone. Just kidding. Really good snacks would be home made cookies or chocolate covered ice creams bars. All of which are in the deep freezer in the garage, where the kids never venture to unless given permission. Because once, the freezer was left open and you can figure out the rest.

2. Do u keep your vehicle clean or am I the only one who has things falling out of their van?  I try VERY, VERY hard to keep my van clean. I regularly have it washed and I don't like clutter left in it. No toys, books, food wrappers, left over food (that will never and has never happened) or what such will be allowed to take up residency in my vehicle. I carry a small dust pan and broom and a micro fiber towel to wipe things down. Yes, I am THAT anal.

3. Have you ever been to Vegas? Nope. Can't say that I have.

4. Warm room light blankets or cold room warm snuggly blanket? Cold room with snuggly blanket. I would get a nose bleed in a warm room. I prefer to not run the heat (this is Florida, mind you) unless it drops to the 30's or below outside. So prepare to wear socks, long sleeves and snuggle into a warm, fuzzy blanket at my place.

5. What is the worst airplane/flying experience you've ever had?When Miss K was 14 months old (2004) and I flew home from Colorado after visiting my cousin who had just had her second child. I bought one ticket and had her ride in my lap. Going there was not bad because the plane was half full and she rode in an empty seat next to me. Coming back, it was a full plane, the afternoon (she missed her nap) and she was bouncing off the walls. It didn't help that we almost missed the plane, they had to hook up the gangplank (or whatever that is) so we could board. I'm sure the people on the plane were thinking oh great, a woman with a child held us up. Just great. K was not content to sit in my lap and watch tv, she was wiggling and crying. The guy next to me went to the bathroom a gazillion times and then he stopped coming back until we were descending. I felt horrible and apologized several times. I never have done that again. I will never try and be frugal and pay the consequences.

Writer's Workshop: Man's Best Friend

Ginger

 Bandit

Jasper

Ryelee

Baron

It seems only like yesterday that some of these dogs were in my life. I'm an animal lover and besides horses, dogs are my favorite furry animal. I believe that most dogs are quite intelligent, but I have a had a few in my lifetime that are a few cards short of a deck. 

Bandit was a beautiful black and white husky with gorgeous blue eyes. My dad had his heart set on getting a husky with blue eyes and when he read the ad in the paper, he loaded us all up to go see this dog. The people selling it lived almost an hour away on a farm. 

I remember there being two puppies, Bandit and his sister, she was a caramel colored female with gold colored eyes. I wanted to bring her home but the decision wasn't up to me. We were there for the blue eyed dog. 

I vaguely remember the details, but my dad made a trade with this farmer and he traded our pet rabbits (my rabbit Black Beauty was included in this trade) with cash for the dog. That evening the farmer came back and loaded up our rabbits and the next day we went back to pick up the dog. That should have been a sign that it wasn't going to work out. He threw up several times in the car on the way home. It was awful. The dog was in the front passenger seat with my mom and she was hollering at my dad because the dog was vomiting. 

The same thing happened several times during the few years we had him. There was one time that after him throwing up my mom opened the car door and he jumped out and ran down the road. That dumb dog ran off and we had to chase him down. It was quite a scene.

He wasn't a very smart dog at all. Beautiful but dumb. 

After a few years of dealing with that dog, my parents put an ad in the paper. They gave him away. I cried the day he went.  Some body showed up that day, said they were there to see the dog and the exchange took place. My parents never disclosed their decision or plan to us kids.

 

I'm linked up with Mama Kat at 

Mamas Losin It

2.) List the names of five dogs from your lifetime. 

Write about why one sparks a stronger memory to you than the others.

What's in YOUR bowl?

I never analyzed why I choose the foods that I do for children. It's common knowledge that "kid" cereals are plain junk and that you don't feed them to your kids. At least that is my idea of them.
My mother never bought them for us and the only time I got a taste of Apple Jacks was when we visited my cousins and that was when we were little. My mother cooked us a meal all the way until high school.

After leaving home I indulged for several years and bought the crap for myself... You know the ones. Reeses Puffs cereal, Fruit Loops....

But my idea changed when I had my own kids. There is not enough nutrition in those boxed cereals. But not much thought went into my choices. I prefer to have my kids eat eggs and wheat toast for breakfast or oatmeal with fruit, or yogurt and fruit with granola. I eat the same things now and I want them to be able to make good choices later too.

So it was befitting to read this article about the top worst cereals you can feed your children. It's written by the editors of Prevention Magazine. It was astounding to see that some of the cereals had as much and if not more sugar in them than a Twinkie! And that is when you serve the suggested size of one cup! That means you don't fill the bowl or you might as well just give your kid a candy bar for breakfast.

It makes me feel good about the choices I have made. We do have cereal in our house and thankfully one of them ranks in the good choices category, Honey Bunches of Oats. I have been buying the Kashi cereals and they didn't do the study on them. I would have liked to see where they rank. They did study some healthy organic choices that can probably be found at stores like Whole Foods or your local health food store.

My kids won't be seeing the likes of these at the breakfast table anytime soon. Maybe if they added some whole grain, cut the sugar and removed the colorful dyes. Ah what's the point.

Memories Captured: Bonding Time

I have taken hundreds of photos of my children. Just in the last month.

I have taken thousands and thousands of photos of my children in the eight and half years I have been their mother.

But then there are those photos that you get and you really don't realize that you captured an essence with the photo. I have taken a few that I look at and can see the moment.

I can feel the emotion that was happening at that moment.

I love this photo that I took this last summer of my children at our final beach trip of the summer.
 We walked on the beach to say goodbye to the ocean, the birds, the salt and sand.

We left them behind and we took some memories home with us forever.

I'm linking up with Galit and Allison.

Friday Fragments #180

I'm Friday Fragging again this week! I've been trying to get back to regular blogging and sometimes I just don't have enough to post or I ramble on and maybe my posts are borrrinng. I kid you not, sometimes I need to try and cut down. I've got to stop getting off track. It happens so easily. Which reminds me of a post my friend Adrienne at Stories from the ShoeBox wrote about with adult ADD.

I finally put on my "big girl" pants and removed some "friends", or used to be friends from my personal Facebook page. I was tired of toxic people that I've talked about more than once. They seemed to be stirring up more drama and I am more grown up than that.

What do you do when your garbage company doesn't pick up the trash? Thanks to some monetary changes, the county changed who picks up our trash. And for two weeks now they haven't come when they should.

A few weeks ago a customer gave me a recipe for Bacon Cheeseburger Pie. I finally made it this week and wow, was it good! It tasted more like a cheesey manwich (sloppey joe) pie, but it was a hit with my husband and Miss K. Little E wanted nothing to do with it.

I lost a few pounds this week. Finally!! I've been struggling with ten pounds that came back after quitting the gym last year. Honestly I really wasn't losing much weight going to the gym and eating better.I blame it on being over 30. My SIL nicely told me once, "you"re no spring chicken anymore". Thanks alot.

I'm on a laundry strike this week. I have actually not washed a load all week. I had the kids bring their dirty clothes into the laundry room last night and just stared at them. Not really. I had good intentions of starting washing but I was exhausted from a full week back to work, taking kids to school/dance classes, midweek church, I couldn't face it. How often do you do laundry?

PYHO: Navigating Through

Navigating through the road map of being a parent to a child diagnosed with ADHD is pretty strenuous. It takes a lot of patience, time and scheduling. Just to name a few things.

For years I struggled with Miss K's inability to focus, stay on task and her horrible time management. Only recently was she diagnosed with ADHD. After the lengthy questionnaires and paperwork they requested before the actual evaluation, she was struggling yet again in school. There was no doubt anymore that I needed to get her help.

Once we finally got an appointment with the doctor, we had Miss K back on track again at school. She was doing better with daily reminders from her teacher. Thank God for understanding teachers. After the diagnosis I was still apprehensive on filling the prescription and actually handing her a pill to take once or, in our case, twice a day. I thought I could still prayerfully make a difference and not medicate her.

So I thought that maybe we could continue with what we were doing. But it was taking it's toll on me and I was neglecting Little E, because I had to spend extra time every day with Miss K. Then she starting slipping again and we were headed downhill. It wasn't surprising, since we'd been there before.

 We just recently started Miss K on the medicine. Slowly we noticed a change in her for the better. Now, after a month of taking her medicine, she is quite different.

It might seem like I could breathe a sigh of relief. Not so fast. It takes some of the pressure off worrying how she will do in school, for the moment.

It's my job to remember to give her the morning pill on time, everyday. It lasts about 4 hours, which then she should take another pill at school to cover her until the afternoon. Of course I was worried about her taking a pill at school. The whole thing with leaving class, everyday to go take her pill. The interruption, being gone and then the kids in her class wondering what she was doing. All those things. So I have been giving her the pill right after school. Which has created another problem. She is not tired when it's bedtime.

So last week, I decided that I would go ahead and get it set up with the school to have her taking her medicine there, right after lunch. I spoke to her teacher about it, so she should would be aware of Miss K leaving class.

I knew her prescription was coming due for a refill. Or shall I say, new prescription written. Thing is another one of the hurdles I will be dealing with, every month, every year, that she is on medicine. The classification of these types of drugs that are prescribed for ADHD, cannot have a refill, by law. So every month I have to call the pediatrician and request a new prescription be written and then wait 48 hours for it to be ready for my pickup. It cannot be called in to the pharmacy.

I picked up the script on Monday and immediately took it to the Target pharmacy, the same pharmacy I used last time to fill it. Of course, they are out of the afternoon (lower dosage) pill. They will have to special order it and it will be in by Friday.

Here's where my mom failure, is going to help us out. Several times I missed getting Miss K here afternoon pill to her on time, so we skipped it on those days and went without. I thought badly of myself at the time, but now it those pills are going to come in handy. But it shouldn't be that way.

I recently heard that the pharmaceutical companies are manufacturing less of these controlled substances, when the amount of children in the United States using them has been on the rise. According to the CDC, that approximately 9.5% or 5.4 million children 4-17 years of age have ever been diagnosed with ADHD, as of 2007.

So like I said, being a parent to a child with ADHD is strenuous, even with medicine to help your child. It's not a quick fix. Not like I ever expected it to be. It makes it easier for her to focus and do well with school and everyday activities and that is most important. Despite the hurdles I am beginning to realize are still there for me, I will continue to muddle through. God gave me my daughter. He knew what he was doing. There is a reason for everything and I wouldn't change it for the world.

My 365 list for 2012

Have you ever heard of a 365 list? I hadn't until last week when one of my fellow bloggers, Kerri @ Kerri's Klutter posted about it. I'm not one for making resolutions for the New Year and when I read her idea, it seemed better suited for me.

It's making a list of goals for the upcoming year instead of resolutions. I used to make resolutions but I could never quite stick with any of them. After I read Kerri's take on this, I figured I could certainly try this. In her words, this is what it is.


Here’s what to do. 
Find a quiet place to think ahead, to the next day, into the weeks ahead of you and of the months full of possibility…. then write down: 
3 things you’d like to work on 
6 things you hope to do 
5 things you would like to get rid of 
Keep the list somewhere you can access it when you need a boost, some direction or a reminder of what you said you’d like to do with your year. Then try. Be kind, don’t beat yourself up if you don’t find lines drawn through every single thing come December 31, 2011…
“You haven’t failed until you stop trying” 

Sounds pretty easy to me.

List for 2012

3 Things I'd like to work on

1. Making better eating choices, get more exercise
2. Patience
3. Organization, filing

6 Things I hope to do

1. Take the kids to South Carolina in the Fall
2. Start my vegetable garden again. 
3. Finish painting my kitchen and hallway.
4. Work on my scrap booking more than once this year. Attend one conference.
5.Prepare myself to sign up Little E for tee ball and rearrange my schedule with Miss K
6. Date night with my husband, once a month.

5 Things I'd like to get rid of

1. The wall border in Little E's room (still up from the nursery theme)
2. The crap under my bed. I don't know what half of it is.
3. All the old shoes in my closet that I don't wear and add them to the pile of clothes ready for Goodwill.
4. 20 lbs off my butt, legs and thighs
5. The empty cd boxes that are piled up in the computer room. My husband thinks we still need them, yet the cd's are filed elsewhere and downloaded on the computer and hard drive.

Friday Fragments #179

Little E decided that the scar on his chin wasn't enough,  he fell off my stool that I sit on at work. It has metal rungs on the bottom, his shoes were wet and he lost his grip while climbing to sit on it. His chin smacked the counter top and then he slid down the front of the rough formica edge scratching his neck. It was the largest strawberry scratch I have ever seen, that was even bleeding a little. I'm thankful that it wasn't much worse. It would have been a bad ending to the Christmas Break.

I still have my Christmas tree up. This week I found some time to move most of the gifts that the kids have been storing under it still. They must think it's going to be there until this Christmas. I'm sure the cat would like it if I left it up, he's been using it as a hiding place from the dog.



My husband found himself a new vehicle after his car accident. Our insurance company decided that his car was a total loss. Thankfully they valued it enough to pay off the lien plus enough for a down payment on another vehicle. He told me the other night that he actually likes his Element better than he liked his Civic. And he LOVED his Civic. I am not exaggerating.

I've been waiting for days, weeks, months....well maybe... for my favorite television shows to come back on and this is the week they have all started back on. Oh how I have missed Grey's Anatomy and Private Practice. I have been filling my lonely tv time with Investigation Discovery channel and Discovery Channel. Not like those channels are bad, but I have seen like everything on them. now .

I failed as a plant owner this year. I blame it on the fact that I did not get any early November cold nights that dipped into the 50's or so to warn me. To prepare me for frigid, col, VERY cold weather that decided to dip into oh, lets say 24 degrees. Now my lawn sucks...my plants are burnt, droopy and dead.

I love when I take cues from other people and it works out. I saw one of Little E's teachers eating sushi for lunch today and thought oh that looks so yummy. Then on my way home from work the kids asked what we were having for dinner and I thought for a moment and heard something about sushi on the radio. oh that sounds so yummy. After turning my van around and heading to the supermarket, I saw on my husband's cousin's facebook page that he enjoyed some sushi tonight. Oh yeah that is going to be so yummy. And it was.

WW: It's What's For Dinner

 4.) Your significant others family is coming over in two hours..think about what’s in your kitchen. Now QUICK…what’s for dinner!?!

My husband loves to spring things on me when I'm not prepared. So this might happen to me and I'll be caught with mismatched foods in the house. We might have enough to feed our family of four, but not enough to feed six people. Lucky enough, this week I have extra chicken. Thank goodness for going to BJ's last weekend and getting a good deal on chicken breasts.

I always have plenty of bread crumbs on hand and my kids love provolone sandwiches so we have plenty of provolone cheese in the fridge. Publix, our local supermarket for those of you who don't live in the south, just had spaghetti sauce on sale so we have sauce.

I'll thaw the chicken and pound it for chicken parmesan. I have wheat spaghetti noodles on hand, so those will have to do. I'll serve romaine lettuce with some parmesan cheese and caesar dressing. I prefer to have fresh schredded cheese on top, but with no time to run to the grocery store I'm out of luck. 

And if I wasn't feeling so fat, I would make dessert. But since this is a last minute visit for dinner, they can deal without dessert. 

They're lucky I wasn't serving turkey hot dogs,  wheat mac and cheese and green beans. If this was a week ago, that would be the only thing I had an overage of. 

PYHO: No One Said it Would Be Easy

For the first time in my life I am not upset or mad that a friend of mine made a choice that has affected me in a hurtful way. I think because I expected it to happen. I had hoped that it wouldn't. But you cannot control what other people are going to do.

For several months I have been dealing with issues in regards to secrets and truths about another friend, who I will name A. My other friend M, with whom I disappointed about, was best friends with A. M knew there was something bothering her husband about A's husband, but she was not aware of the secret until early November when her husband finally confronted A's husband about his cheating on his wife.

I knew A's husband was cheating. But how do you tell your friend that her husband is cheating? You don't. There is no easy or right way to do it. It always backfires when you tell some one else that their loved one is doing something wrong. And I've always been taught not to meddle.

M's husband had known for quite some time about the infidelity and A's husband had sworn him to secrecy about it and promised that he wouldn't cheat anymore. The problem: he had not stopped and was beginning to have a relationship with another woman. A's husband had decided enough was enough and was going to sever the friendship between the families. He felt that A's husband was a bad influence and didn't want his children around that.

M was devastated that her friendship was jeopardy. After the confrontation between the husbands, A called M. A was furious with her friend, she was in denial about her husband and she did not know who to believe. M tried talking to A and giving her advice, but A was not having anything to do with that.

Sadly, it created tension everywhere. My husband, who also knew of the infidelity, was confronted by A's husband just a day after the shoe was dropped. A's husband was trying to cover all his tracks and when he spoke with my husband  he said, " let's keep what you  know on the down low". My husband flat out refused to lie for him anymore. Which only forced the end to my friendship with A also.

I have been content without having A in my life anymore. My husband and I had already started distancing ourselves from them and the group of friends that we all hung out with. I have thought of her many times and prayed for her healing, since she chose to stay with her husband. Which is another post entirely.

But M is not content. She has not taken the separation well and I knew that she wouldn't. M and her husband have been coming to church with my husband and I regularly since the confrontation. There have been several sermons where it was as if the pastor knew what was going on. M and I would look at each other during service and we knew.

However, she has taken the messages differently than I have. Which can happen. So just the other day we were talking on the phone and she asked me about making plans to go see MJ in the end of January. Of course I was wanting to go too. Then she dropped the bomb. "Well A and her husband are going and they are getting a head count."  WHAT??


I couldn't believe that she was going with them and wanted to know if I wanted to go too? I am still in shock about it as I write this. I told her that I would not be hanging around that crowd and we got off the phone. That same day in the evening I wrote her through text. I flat out asked her if she and A were on good terms again.

I knew the answer but I wanted to hear it from her. She said that they were kosher and that she forgave A, which I still don't understand. A should have been asking for forgiveness for turning her back on her friends. I can understand wanting to stay with your husband and working through the issues, getting marriage counseling. But don't turn your back on your friends.

I am not mad about M choosing to go back. Disappointed, yes. I had half hoped that it would have been longer so that M could see what it was like to have her own life. She has always been a shadow of A and tries to always be like her. I knew it was tough for her to not be wrapped up in A's life and I was so proud that she was making decisions for herself.

I will be a good friend and still be friends with M. But I will not associate with A anymore, not even for M. I am doing what is best for my family.