Tuesday, July 20, 2010

Pour Your Heart Out:Sacrifices

Pour Your Heart Out

It's anything that YOU consider pouring your heart out. There isn't ever a theme or topic that you have to blog about- it's completely a personal thing.

Please grab the button for your post and link up with Shell at Thing's I Can't Say.

Again, just a brief reminder that everyone linking is pouring their hearts out and we should all be respectful in our comments. ;)

We all make sacrifices. The biggest thing I sacrifice is time. I am beginning to regret my sacrifice and I feel bad about it. Especially because what it means for regretting it. This has been a busy month. It's taking it's toll on me and I am sad that I am getting aggravated by the crunch.

This month has been so busy for me that I have had to make my phone send me alarms and messages to make sure I keep my schedule straight. I have skipped some stuff to allow for other things to happen. I say this year after year that I will not volunteer for it but I some how let myself get pulled in. I am regretting Vacation Bible School because of how much time I have to put into to it and how it affects me. I lose time with my kids, keep Miss K up late and miss out on fun activities with Little E who is too little to attend our program.

But on the other hand I enjoy spending time with the other 35 or so other children I see at VBS. There are about a dozen that I have seen come every year and they look forward to seeing me. Most of the children that attend our VBS come from broken homes, low income families. It warms my heart when I see them walk in and enjoy the two hours they spend with us. How could I miss and not see them? They only get five days of me and my kids will have me the other 360 days.

But why do I feel so guilty for sacrificing my time with them? It has been so hard to rush around in the late afternoon to get ready for VBS and make it there on time. I get upset and frustrated and wish I had not signed up. Tuesday night I noticed that I was more agitated and depressed that I have not been having family dinner time.

I am looking forward to the busy week to be over. I feel that I am sacrificing my children's time for other children. I know that God understands because I am doing his work. I am spreading his word to children who may not hear it any other time. They deserve my best face and attitude. It's just hard battle to face every day. It's one of those times that I cannot have my cake and eat it too. Life is about choices. I hope I'm making the right one.


Frugal Vicki said...

I am sure that is really really hard..but you are right, you are doing something really important. And your kids will recognize that as well.

Rose said...

it can be a struggle between beibg with your children vs a larger no.of children. you are doing a much needed role helping a no. of children teaching them about Jesus.

Shell said...

You are definitely doing a good thing. But, I hope that after this week, things can slow down a little for you.

Thanks for linking up.

Adrienne said...

This is touch one for me too! I was a leader in the childrens' minstry at my church for a couple of years, but I had to step down for many of the same reasons. It's hard to serve in outside ministry when we are called to serve our family first. You're doing a excellent thing, and you will be blessed for it, I'm sure! At least VBS is temporary. My prayers are with you to get through the week, and really enjoy those kiddos. Sometimes it helps to know that it's temporary. Don't feel guilty, just try to have fun with it. :)

Alexis AKA MOM said...

I've been so bad with over volunteering also at church. I need to lay off some so I don't get upset and just quit which is not what I want at all. It's just a point when you have to say enough, I'm giving to much and loosing me.

Just Another Mom of 2 said...

Oh I can almost hear your exhaustion in your post! You are doing an amazing thing, and we can only ever do our best. I hope that things settle a little bit for you (hugs).

Jenn said...

I know only too well your dilemma! I am HEAVILY involved in the children's ministries at our church and know what kind of commitment and time that takes. It's such a struggle to see yourself giving up time with your family to be with other children...but know that if God is calling you to work in this ministry, He will bless your efforts. And look at the example of service you are giving to your children! They will carry that into their adult lives and will serve themselves because of the example you have given them!

Tylaine said...

I KNOW you are making thr right choices. You're children know they are loved and that is more important than any amount of activities. You are setting an example for them by spending time with less fortunate children and even if they don't always like it now in the long run they will remember your example and that will make them better people. :) And God knows your heart. He understands we can't do everything our hearts desire. :)